Nerd

DISCLAIMER: THIS *ISH IS LONG.

For the past week or so, I have been troubling myself to figure out a topic to explore in my next blog post. I have sifted through the events of each day, often smiling at the wackier occurrences and slight irritations that have always seemed to be the norm for me. They remind me of a time when I asked a friend, “Why do these things always seem to happen to me?” She responded simply,

“I believe God allows these things to happen to people like us because he has given us a gift to voice them.”

Profound, right? I’m sure she won’t mind that I paraphrased and gussied up her observation. My mind is tricky when it comes to recall. Anyway, it’s been hard to settle on a subject that will allow me to preserve both the names of those involved and the significant hilarity of the event retold. Maybe you’ve noticed that in most of my posts, a crackerjack of wisdom is nestled somewhere amongst the fluff. Or, it could be that I’m just feeling myself this fine spring morning. Whatever the case, allow me to present to you the post for the day. Please enjoy.

For the past few months – since the closing days of 2007 – the desire to write some sort of research/scholarly paper has been nudging me like a three-year-old kid brother. Wouldja QUIT IT ALREADY??? What the heck is wrong with me?! I graduated on time and in good standing
for a REASON. You woulda thought experimenting with my camera phone and justifying it as research for this grand scheme of a project would have taught me a lesson by now. But, no. It hasn’t. Here the desire is again, riding me like a second shadow, forcing me to entertain it with some morsel of bookishness to temporarily quiet its rapacity. It was less of a problem when I was posting regularly for black history month. Every once in a while it reared its ugly head to impel me to do more than the (almost) daily postings on my blog and in my office, where I did a black history alphabet that stopped at the letter M. But since my near week-long birthday celebration, it’s fully resurrected its aggravating self. Therefore, observe.

I am a NERD. I would take the time to explain to you the theoretical differences between a nerd, a dork, and a geek, but I’d rather save that discussion for when the desire to research starts gnawing at my kneecaps. I am not the purest form of a nerd – nerdus primus; but I would categorize myself as nerdus minimus, and more accurately as nerd-dorkus minimus, a hybrid of the lesser attributes of both a nerd and a dork. Relate it, if you will, to bulimia. Like someone diagnosed with this ravaging disorder, I binge like a pedantic brown-noser to knowledgeable surfeit before purging in relentless prattle to anyone who will listen to…or read what I have to say. Even now in writing this post, I’ve used at least three vocab words I learned in the 10^th grade and have referenced both an online dictionary and thesaurus too many times to count. After purging I go back to my typically sedentary and dorkish life, which is frequently entertained by computer games such as Burger Shop and Delicious Deluxe, and now Wii Mario Galaxy.

While now is as good a time as any to exercise being concise, it’s probably too late. I said all that to say, that once I finished my work yesterday the fiendish urge to do a power point presentation arrested my attention. This isn’t the first time I’ve done a ppp “just because,” either. Then I thought to myself, for this to be ultimately effective, I should write a paper to accompany and guide the presentation! I finished the thought by justifying it as lesson material for students who want to know how present outstanding research in a professional and stimulating format. (That’s what the OTHER presentation was supposed to be for…)In reality, one of my students did a presentation and embarrassed me so greatly that I was undoubtedly inspired to do something to make up for her inadequacy. You may be thinking that it was my responsibility to make sure she didn’t go out there lookin’ crazy, but I reject this notion. I am NOT a trained and certified teacher. This particular student clearly has learning disabilities – the specificity of which I am completely unaware - and I have been unsuccessful at helping her because we cannot efficiently communicate. While I can sometimes manage to grasp her point of view, I can never seem to express myself in a way that renders her anything but confused. She has often voiced this. This is not an attempt to blame the student, I honestly do feel responsible and guilty that I cannot be more effective with her, but dagnab…I only know – and get paid – so much.

In any event, she felt good about the presentation and the engaging questions asked by the (confused) guest class. At least in this I was granted some solace, little as it was.

Back to the topic at hand. So I’m super juiced about my Power Point Presentation, and am pleased with my first slide. I want to engage and relate to the students that may possibly see this, so I decide to add some music. I choose “Elevator” by Flo Rida (that name cracks me up – it’s deep tho!) f. Timberland, because of it’s techy sound and grinding beat. It’s new and fresh, and I think it perfectly matches my topic: “The Science of Attraction”. Hopefully I actually follow through with this project, and don’t give up mid-way as is customary for me to do, due to my dorkus minimus qualities. The plan is to peruse the research already done on the subject, and flavor it with an “Ask a Sista ‘Cause It’s Free!!” point of view. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPUG1aox4ZM&feature=related).

So the first thing I do when I get into work this morning is look up the song. It’s bumpin’ even harder than I remember. I’m convinced that it is the right choice. In fact, I’m feelin’ it so much that I consider adding a slide of pictures of hot men and women that will build up to the title slide. It is in this search that I found the reason to write all of this. A picture of Reggie Bush came up, which led me to a site filled with photographs of celebrity interracial couples. Somehow, I think it was via a picture of Common, I got to a picture of the latest cover of Vogue Magazine. On it, Lebron James and Gisele are questionably posed. I first saw the magazine this past Sunday while at the grocery store with a friend. We both looked at it and were mildly disturbed, not because we were seeing a black man and white woman together – please – but because Lebron looked like an enraged gorilla dribbling a basket ball in one hand and holding on to a delicate Gisele in the other. “I don’t like this,” I said to my friend. “Yeah,” she agreed. Little more was said. She purchased her Frosted Flakes and milk and we headed back to her place to eventually end up playing Wii Mario Galaxy for four hours. The thought of posting on the topic got lost somewhere in the first few levels.

Imagine my glee when I was reminded of the topic, especially when it was accompanied with the comment, “Lebron James criticized for Vogue cover”. I eagerly clicked the link to read the word. It wasn’t much, and it wasn’t too harassing. Basically, the writer explained how an ESPN writer felt that Lebron looked like King Kong (which was exactly the comparison I was grasping for on Sunday) and could have been presented differently, particularly since he is the first African American male to grace the cover. For one, a commentator suggested, his impeccable sense of style and dress could have been displayed. It IS Vogue, after all. I agree. I don’t really follow sports, but the few pictures of Lebron that I’ve seen depict him smiling at the very least. He seems like a nice, respectable young man. So why is he depicted as a rabid basketball guerrilla, with no sense of his surroundings (as he is appareled in appropriate b-ball attire)? I don’t blame Lebron, though his dress for the shoot probably should have tipped him off. I blame whoever chose to pick that picture as the cover, and I wonder how Lebron feels and if he is as concerned as others are.

Right now, I need to go back to creating my presentation, though. Please hit the comment box up with stimulating questions and comments related to any portion of this post – thanks!

P.S. I was looking for a picture of the cover to copy and paste in this post, when I found a video of the photo shoot for the Vogue Shape Issue. Athletes and models were juxtaposed as a balance between fitness and beauty. I forget the names, but an ice skater and that redhead skate boarder were also interviewed along with models, but Lebron and Gisele had the spot light. Ironically, Lebron made an interesting comment in the vid. He said, "One thing thing that Gisele has taught me about modeling is to keep a bright smile on your face at all times".
http://www.style.com/vogue/voguediaries/031408